Today we will usher our middle cat to the Rainbow Bridge. It is time. Milly has been wallowing with a variety of ailments; a mysterious concoction of cancer, heat stroke, and old age.
She’s lying beside me, and she is unusually quiet. Perhaps she knows. I have run out of tears. My eyes are swollen like golf balls from crying, as I look at her and I see how fatigued she is.
Two weeks ago, we took her to the vet, and they gave her a very strong antibiotic. Maybe it was too much for her little frame to bear. Since then, she has been living her life at half-mast. There is no antidote for the shot they gave her. Of course, the vet recommends more tests, and more expense. They are good at that.
For a moment, we are comforted when we see her clawing on the scratching post, but then she goes back to lying on the pillow, listless again, as if she’s waiting, waiting to be released.
This is a hard time for anyone who owns a pet; wondering if they will rally, or if you should spare them additional misery and send them on to greener pastures. As pets get into their teens, we know that this is a vulnerable time for them.
You never know what’s going to go wrong, and when it does, you are faced with the uncertainty of your decisions.
My cat’s fur feels like a sable coat. It is soft and luxurious. How can Milly be so beautiful when she is dying?
Our two other cats look on with curiosity and disgust. I’m sure they know that she is sick and they are doing their best to stay away from her.
Is this how nature culls the herd?
Soon, there will be the four of us – two cats and two people. The dynamics of our house so will change.
Already one of my cats is taking over the pillow Milly used to own. The other cat is now dominating her chair. It is kind of like an employee getting fired, and you rob his office of the staplers, pens, and pencils.
Life will go on, but it will be abbreviated in a pathetic way. I will miss my Milly and the joy that she is brought me for the past 11 years. Perhaps she will visit us in some other fashion.
I look forward to that day.
About Guest Blogger Mary McGrath:
Mary McGrath is the proud servant to two cats. Sparky is a spunky 20-year old Siamese. Holly, at age 14 is a beautiful Ragdoll. Mary’s work has been published in a number of publications including Newsweek, Good Housekeeping, The National Lampoon and LA Times.
For more information: Mary McGrath Photography